The bench needs to be scooted over here to the area where i’m standing, and spun around to face the wall.

Benches-facing-the-wrong-direction is a not-uncommon urban design error in U.S. public spaces, but sheesh I think this might be out-and-out the most utter example I have seen thereof.
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In downtown Sandusky, Ohio, on June 24th, 2009, in "Peddlers’ Alley," west of Columbus Avenue and north of West Market Street.
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